Without reproach and ridicule: how to be friends with someone who does not drink

Millenialy drink less than the previous generation, and following them tsentenialy even more committed to a healthy lifestyle - at least, so say some research.

Despite this, the cult of alcohol in our society is still very strong: drinking and smoking continue romanticized in films, it remains an important part of any holiday ritual and a sure way of communication. Heroine believes that the decision to drink alcohol or not should be a personal choice, but what many of us just is not enough - so it's tolerant attitude to non-drinkers. Tell us how to be friends with abstainers people without the pressure and ridicule.

Think twice before asking why a person does not drink

It is an innocuous question can be very personal. People choose abstinence for various reasons and not always neutral. It is possible that this is the result of trauma, disease consequence, physiological intolerance to alcohol or other unpleasant experience. Although with the same probability it could just be a deliberate choice, made without any pressure.

In any case it is necessary to be careful, asking a similar question the unfamiliar person, otherwise you risk to put him in an awkward position. The maximum that can be refined, he does not drink at all or only today - so you'll know whether or not to re-raise with them the issue of alcohol at your next party.

People often require quite respectful of other (in their opinion) the justification sober lifestyle. Not accede to the curious - is a good way to support the non-drinking man.

Think of a positive sobriety, not down

If you're not ready to give up alcohol, do not do it, but do not regard someone's decision to maintain a healthy lifestyle as a reproach in your direction. Often Drinker people uncomfortable with teetotalers convinced, because they seem to them too correct.

The decision not to drink alcohol does not say anything about the moral principles and did not make a man better than those who drink. Try not to sneer and to refrain from comments in the spirit of: "Wow, we have the right." Of course, if a sober person himself behaves friendly and does not try to impose your way of life.

Do not try to persuade the person to drink

For all attempts to convince the person to drink "at least a glass", "only for health" and "for introducing" one has only one thing - the lack of respect for his decision. It does not matter why he made such a choice, it is worth listening to, even if the reason is a simple unwillingness to drink specifically this evening. What you uncomfortable by someone sober, not a reason to force a person to do what he does not like.

Get rid of the stereotype that a sober man - boring person

Many of us alcohol helps you relax, cheer up, find a common language with other people and have fun. But there are also many people who for all this drinking is not necessary. They are open, positive, uninhibited and without alcohol (well bore may remain boring and after a couple of bottles).

Try to avoid the stereotypical thinking that drunk people are bored with the sober and vice versa. Do not confuse "create and talk nonsense" to "have fun", these things often do not coincide.

to create a comfortable space for temperance

If you are throwing a party at which alcohol would be better to tactfully invite a sober friend or a girlfriend, too. Our society is not so much a safe and comfortable space for non-drinking people: almost any holiday, and public events such as the birth of a child or a major purchase, they have to explain to people that are not alcohol, and to deal with sympathetic or discontented comments.

To your attitude to non-drinkers become more tolerant, try to treat them as a normal part of society. Sometimes it means to provide a bar with non-alcoholic cocktails on your holiday, ask what they prefer to drink, or to say that you're proud of your sober friend and support her decision. Show that the presence of alcohol or its absence does not affect your relationship.

do not load a person additional duties just because he does not drink

Often, the default non-drinkers impose on the role of man, "serving fun." Go for alcohol razvezti guests, help with the cleaning - that nondrinkers do things like that easier than a drunk, it does not mean that it is his duty.

There is nothing wrong to ask for help in organizing a party or to take when it is offered. But do not forget that a sober man also came here to have fun and relax, and it has no less right to it than the drinker.