9 simple habits to help you become a strong and independent
Be strong and independent is not easy, especially if you're used to rely on others, never faced with life's challenges and not confident. not enough to just give up independence from the help of others - it is necessary to raise a number of important qualities and change their vision of the world. We picked 9 of simple habits that will help you in the development of its inner strength and independence.
1. Earn more money
Money - the evil, but they open the way to freedom and independence. Once you establish your financial stability, no longer have to depend on someone's help and support - either from parents or your partner. If you can not work from 9 to 5 because of studies or services, then find second jobs - a great way to earn money for their personal needs. If you work, but still can not consider themselves free, then maybe it is time to start searching for a new job, where you will pay more.
2. Say "I" instead of "we"
In a marriage or a serious relationship teamwork is important, as it is it helps to build a strong relationship. But independence is important, not less, because if one of the partners will continue to drag myself to the other, the happiness you can not see: you will for each other ballast, not to mention the fact that the charge on the other their problems simply unfair and counterproductive. At that time, as a support to help you survive the difficulties of independence make life easier and will allow you both to move forward. Therefore, let your partner's personal space and do their own thing, enjoy what you can do much to itself. This will help to grow up and make relations more mature.
3. solve their own problems
Psychologists advise a good exercise for those who can not cope with their own difficulties: every time you have a problem, treat it as a secret that you do not want to tell anyone. This will help you to stop depends on the people around them, even when you will feel that the earth opened beneath his feet.
If you can solve everything by yourself, do it and control the situation, asking for help only when nothing more from you regardless. In fact, to ask for help, there is nothing wrong, but do not make it a habit, otherwise you will never be able to become self-sufficient, to live their lives.
4. The set realistic goals
Look at things really - a great habit that brings independence. Instead of telling yourself, "This year I make a million" is better to put a less ambitious but more realistic goal: "This month, I will save 20% of salary." The easier it is to reach the goal at the beginning, the easier you will regroup under a new lifestyle where you achieve success without relying on others. Subsequently, do the larger goal, but remember that achieving it depends only on you and your hard work.
5. Sometimes, to be dependent - of course
Reaching success, you gain confidence and a sense of self-worth, which is a fertile ground for independence. Once you have managed to achieve something, then you do not need the support. But you should fall, as you once again depends on such things as attention, care and comfort. In other words, the independence carries a new dependency. But there is nothing wrong with that, because you have to understand that life consists of ups and downs. You should learn to tolerate the failure of their own, without turning to the suffering masses, with which we have to deal with your family and friends.
To be truly independent, you must pull yourself together, take responsibility for their failures and be able to correct them.
6. defend its ideals of
Be independent - it means to be able to stand on his own, especially when it comes to your values and ideals. In most cases, children rely on parents, spouses -
at each other, and friends - to their friends, because they share the same outlook on life. If you depend on their environment, their approval and support, you can easily change to what you believe, even without realizing it. If you are strong enough to stand on his own, to think outside the box and to change what is considered "normal", then you will achieve intellectual, emotional and physical independence in a very short period of time.
7. Expand social circle
It's all about simple math: The more friends you have, the less you depend on them. When you constantly expand your social circle, you have the opportunity to communicate with new people and spend time and energy on something to get to know them better. This gives your close friends and family to "rest" on the fact that you are codependent. The more friends you have - the more opportunities to be in the place where you did not before, and to do what was not used to do. Thus you become more mature, versatile and independent.
8. Live separately
Live separately - the best test of strength that only you can take to become an adult. To live in the parental home is pleasant, but only responsible for its own economy can give you the potential for growth and development. Making, washing, cleaning, cooking, spending time in the company itself - all of this will only strengthen your independence. If in twenty you still live like a schoolgirl, then it is time to rethink their views of the world, set realistic goals and just do a big and bold move - to move.
9. Ask for help, but do not depend on it
Ask for help is perfectly normal, since we live in a society and we can not completely isolate yourself from it. But it is very important to learn to ask for help so as not to lose their independence. There is a great likelihood that you turn for help not because they tried all the options, but because they do not realize until the end of its potential. Very simply stop to break yourself, knowing that you have someone to cover. If every time the situation becomes complicated, you do not ask for help and try to solve it myself, you see, the effort requires a real success. Living like a lone wolf, coping with everything myself, you see how much you actually strong.
In the end, independence - is a reflection of how you are confident in yourself and your abilities. To it also belong, and love of self and healthy self-esteem. The stronger your feelings to herself, the more you are free and independent. Be sure that you do not need someone else's approval and ongoing support to go through your life happily.