7 mistakes that you admit in dealing with people
The inability to say "no" and to live according to their own desires - a problem that interested in modern psychology more than the feminist struggle for equality. Hence the popularity of articles with tips on how to properly withhold and what he wants. But if we were initially the right approach to the choice of his surroundings, he would not have had to rebuild the toxic behaviors. If you wonder why a magnet for unwanted situations, annoying people, we will tell you what mistakes you make in communication and how to fix them. By following these tips, you can narrow down your psevdodruzey.
1. trusts personal topics strangers
Distinguish between personal life with the rest of it is important not only because of your preferences in bed can learn the entire office. When it becomes clear with the unfamiliar person, it shortens the distance between you and give him a reason to consider you my friend. Once the spout soul, you risk permanently doom oneself to listening to the vicissitudes of life is indifferent to you man.
2. Too polite
Before you go beyond the duty of courtesy, think, why you this. We all want to be kind and loving people, but we should not turn his humanity in helpfulness. For example, it is not necessary to maintain any conversation, unless, of course, we are not talking about the salary increase. Understand that around full of people who are just waiting for the opportunity to litter someone's head with their meaningless conclusions.
3. You are not able to deny
It is not necessarily about the specific aid, and any interactions: go to someone in the movie, although it would be better left at home, go out for a smoke for the company, but can not tolerate cigarette smoke. Ready to endure any meal, but would not say "no." Think how much time, nerves and energy you can save, explaining once that you have no desire to spend time with that person.
4. You can not leave a message unanswered
Supported ridiculous nonsensical dialogues on social networks simply because it is inconvenient to leave a message unanswered. Communication is based on the principle of "How are you?", "What's new?", And now you have to report on how the spent the day, some stranger dude. Not all people feel that violate your personal space. Even if the answer is very reluctantly and tersely - they will spread a thin layer of talk, every word out of you pulling vitality.
5. afraid to be honest
Equate honesty to rudeness - a major misconception. To stop unwanted communication, not necessarily rude and send a person to hell. Enough words, "You're a great guy (a colleague, a neighbor, a former classmate, the son of my mother's friends, a pizza deliveryman - underline), but I will not be friends with you, I'm not interested."
This may not sound very friendly, but not as hypocritical as the eternal excuses why you are very busy these and all subsequent weekend.
6. succumb to the mood of
Sometimes you just gave in good mood and friendly treated you to an unpleasant person. The mood was gone, but the man still thinks like you, but is it worth to blame? Be ready to take responsibility for the fact that someone has entered misleading its goodwill.
Attention! Be responsible - in any case not to continue the dialogue against their will.
7. worry about what you think of the
Unwillingness to seem mad sociopath lures you in unnecessary network connections. It is likely that after the failure of your man thinks you wicked, ill-mannered, surly, arrogant, and the devil knows what else the conclusions he comes. Even if you're nice to them, as if nothing had happened, it does not guarantee that he will not make the same disappointing conclusion about your personality. Therefore, spit on what you think about, does not reflect at all that people have in their heads.
If you end up in a situation where in uninvited friends tags a colleague or boss, which will still interact, is not allowing the release of the working relationship framework and read the first item on our list.